General Thoughts

I thought I'd share a few things that ran through my mind on the way home from the supermarket... I was thinking about what I would tell someone starting out on this journey to help them reduce any potential feelings of insecurity:

• Confidence is sexy - the more positive you are, the more fun you'll have.  You both want to explore this, so enjoy it and don't keep apologising.  There is nothing more unsexy than someone constantly saying sorry. Don't forget, he is feeling apprehensive too and he will feed off your energy.
• Practice particularly your aim if it's not too hot.  Mine wasn't to start with.  The poor old cushions had to suffer me learning how to use some of the implements.  Their sacrifice wasn't in vain though, my partners bottom sports very accurate marks.
• Talking of bottoms, they are very resiliant and can take a lot more punishment than you imagine.  Generally, a good warm up is needed unless he's been really naughty. The warm up reduces marking which can also be helped by giving some of the punishment over his clothes. Don't hit the same spot to often and make sure you don't break the skin.
• If you are punishing as opposed to playing, use firm strokes.  In my experience, you will get more respect if you do.  As a general rule, if he's making the right noises and struggling to hold position, we are on the right track.  Don't slacken off on the firmness of the strokes. Increase them and vary them.  I always slip a couple of real stingers in because I can. The last one is always the hardest and he knows the penalty for breaking the rules on this one.  
• Always do what you say you are going to do.  Nothing undermines your ability to discipline more than not carrying out what you say you will. 

I'm quite getting to enjoy these moments of reflection :o)